Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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