through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Randomize
