I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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