He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
