Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
3 2 1 whiskey
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
