Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
