i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
