I will die if light touches me.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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