Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize