just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
