..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
if only i could text you this smell
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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