Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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