Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
