sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
