Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
she pinky promised me she was 18
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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