a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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