No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
