My hand turned me down
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize