i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Enjoy the penises
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
