So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
