Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
