Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize