Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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