Duck Duck Cougar?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
