So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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