It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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