i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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