My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
