I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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