she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
