he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Randomize
