I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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