He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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