Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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