Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
