So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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