My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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