He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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