She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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