the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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