you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
