It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
That reminds me...we need to get swords
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
