No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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