Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
