OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
