i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
