just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
