Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
she smelled like a LAN party
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
