If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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