So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
